Good-bye, Testicles

Well well well... How long has it been? Jesus H. and all the ships at sea, almost 2 months. Tis wrong what I've done here, not writing and all. But I am writing something now, and you'll read it, and you'll like it. Maybe...

So my cat Jackson is going in next Tuesday to have his fuzzy white testes lopped off. Is that what they do these days? They still lop them off? Or do they just give him a vasectomy? Cauterize his seminiferous tubules? Look, sex education hard at work, I remembered seminiferous tubules. Anyway, I think it's about time he had the operation because the animal is on a rampage. Every morning I deal with the garbage being knocked over, mad attacks on my wall calendar, the stalking of my feet, and full on attacks of my person. I love him to pieces, he just needs some pieces removed and then maybe he'll calm down a bit.

He's been hankering for some kitty lovin' across the street; a saucy little bob-tailed minx named, of all things, Cher. He sits across the street and longs for her kitty hotness. I am disgusted. My cat need only be interested in food and toys. And sitting quietly and calmly. And purring.

I'll let you know how things turn out, and whether or not he retains his snowball nads. I'll miss the snowball nads. But cat sex? Ew.